Mother of 2

I was tagged by Joni for Mother’s day.

The rules are simple: (1) Post a photo of you and your mom together (recent or old) and write the words “I heart my mom” across it (or type the text below the photo if you don’t feel like opening your image-editing software). (2) Tag your friends!

The thing is - and you may laugh at me - I haven’t got a picture of my mom and myself! At least not a softcopy of it. I have tons of pictures of my mom, myself, my mom with my kids, my mom and dad but not one with my mom and me. I have many printed pictures of my mom and me - we had tons when she visited me in the states - but I do not have a scanner so I am unable to scan and post those online. (I am starting to believe I really need a scanner).

And because I want to participate in this, I am instead posting a picture of my mom and my eldest son taken a couple of years ago.

I love my mom and I know she loves me and my kids. She has gone through a lot of difficulties with me and heartaches caused by me but despite that, she has remained by my side always. We may not always see eye-to-eye but we both love each other a lot. Love ya mommy! The kids love you too!

Happy mother’s day to all moms like me (and dads too!)! analyse, andrea, christianne, inkblots, jane, kongkong622, MegaMom, mitchteryosa, mixednuts, MM del Rosario, mommyhoodmoments, patty, raqgold, rufflebutts, Dette, kim…

Ok! I confess… I have a lot of weird and unnecessary fears and phobia. One major fear I have since I was a kid is my fear of the dark. I remember how I used to pester my sisters and older brother by passing on to them chores my mom asked me to do if it meant I would have to go into a dark room or to the back of the house where there is no light. I was my siblings pain in the *tt because I often woke them up in the middle of the night to accompany me to the bathroom when I feel like peeing. Just between us… my husband now feels the same way. Hehe.

Through the years, I picked up several more fears. Fear of slimy slithery animals, fear (or is it dislike) of dogs, fear of crowds, fear of strange men… among others. In many instances my reaction to certain animals, people, movies and sounds are witnessed by my kids. Most of the time I wonder if I ever had a hand in what they fear now. My eldest son is afraid of thunder that just today he kept crying until the rain and eventually the thunder stopped.

I wouldn’t want to cause such negativity in my kids upbringing. I am sure they will come out with their own fears but they do not have to get them from me. Each time I feel like cringing at the sight of our neighbors large Saint Bernard, I swallow and look away instead. Sometimes I freeze. Mostly I just stiffen up. But I am concerned more about influencing my kids than my own phobia. Besides, THAT dog will not dare eat me right?

I am a mother of two and with my eldest going 5 next month, I must say I have had my share of Jollibee Kiddie Parties, McDonalds and even KFC kiddie parties. I used to think they were the best choice for me as I get too busy to even think about organizing my own kid’s party. Choosing that method though will set you off a couple of thousand pesos.

This year, I have decided to challenge myself into organizing a very simple fun afternoon for my 2-year old son and his neighborhood friends for his birthday. I decided on planning the afternoon event myself with the overall goal of not spending more than P2,000. Tough right? Well not exactly. I gotta say my kids and their friends (and yayas even) certainly had fun. We (and my yayas) had fun as well. The party was a success in my book.

How did I do it?

1. Rent kiddie table sets. C’mon, if you are having kids for the party, why rent the big tables? Everyone, even I, can fit snuggly into the tiny monoblock chairs. Price: P60 for a set of 1 kiddie table with tablecloth and 4 kiddie chairs (Bebe’s Balloons)

2. Buy those simple balloons reminiscent of my own birthdays when I was much much younger. Price: P16 each blue balloon that comes printed already.

3. Serve sweet spaghetti, pinoy style. Since the guests will be kids, I doubt they will appreciate pasta that is al dente. This time I did not buy my usual Balducci Penne noodle but instead chose Royal Spaghetti. I also chose to use Del Monte Filipino Style Spaghetti Sauce instead of mixing up my own sauce from scratch. Add some thin red hotdogs, ground pork and you’ve got Jollibee Spaghetti - which a lot of kids absolutely love. Price: (approx) P300.

4. Get your family to chip in. Birthday cake from Red Ribbon c/o Tito. Chocolate Ice Cream and cones from Selecta c/o Lola. Price: Free

5. Dig up stock of disposable party items at home. Paper plates, kubiertos, drinking cups c/o myself. Price: Can’t recall.

6. For entertainment and giveaways, my yaya went to the market in Kalentong and filled a big bag with goodies like small coloring books (Spongebob, Barney, Transformers, Barbie), Bubble blowing toys, little pink princess notepads, Spongebob stickers, plastic cars and robots. Price: P5 to P10.

My kids and their friends totally had fun. My yayas and I were all exhausted but the enjoyment we got out of the happiness of my little boy (and his kuya) overcame the ache we felt in our toes, and in our knees from running around all day…. simply priceless!

When I was young, I often dreamt of traveling abroad, going to Disneyland or Knott’s Berry Farm. I would always listen to fabulous stories from my classmates after coming back from summer vacation about how they have been here or there. At that time, my only experience riding an airplane was during a school fieldtrip. I had relatives that lived abroad and I often wondered how their lives were like compared to ours.

My work allows me opportunities for overseas employment. I have had several offers to work abroad (Asia and the US) and at one time, I even aggressively pursued those possibilities. When I was in Arizona a couple of years back on an assignment, I realized how I was not cut out to live amongst strangers and away from family. Oh yeah, I loved the fact that I earned enough to buy me a closet full of clothes, shoes and bags, and eat lobster any time I wished. But after the sun sets and I find myself alone in my apartment, I think how my shoes can never replace the witty banter my sisters are always having, or my mom’s tendency to remind me to do the something a hundred times a day, or my dad’s jokes that he keeps on repeating several times a day.

So am I just thinking of myself? Here I am with the chance to earn big and help my family out and I turn away. Even now, I can work abroad if I want to and earn lots of money. Technically, it would really help me and my husband establish our lives, build a home and give our kids all they can ever hope for. But I choose not to. And my husband supports me in that decision.

More money is good, but being with my family is best. I want to be there for every smile, tear, and wound that my kids have. I want to be the one to prepare my husband’s coffee every morning. I want to be the one to plan our vacation. I want to be there. Many think I should be more practical instead of ideal. I disagree. Do you?

Yes its true. But to clarify further, I did not fantasize about cheating, rather I had a strange dream the other night about cheating. And guess who the guilty person was? ME! It was so vivid and so unforgettable, I can still recall the events that unfolded in my dream. I can still see myself sneaking off to meet my lover in a place that felt so familiar yet I know I have never seen it before. I can still recall the anticipation of being with my lover and the excitement and adrenalin rush brought on by the deceit.

HALT!

That is not me at all. I cannot imagine myself indulging in such a relationship where I am actually the initiator. I love my husband too much. I love my kids too much.

Weird…

I am a full time working mom and because of that I only get to do chores, pay bills, shop, buy groceries, fix the house and similar tasks during the weekend. The problem is that is also the time I spend with my kids. Which makes it longer for me to get around to doing some home decorating or fixing for that matter.

At night, when the kids are asleep, is the time I could spend browsing for stuff that I need to buy for the house. But, malls and stores close at 8 or 9PM. That does not leave me enough time to do everything.

Since I spend most of my free time in front of a computer, it would be nice if Philippine stores also have their own websites similar to Circuit City or Ikea or even The Home Depot where you can shop at the comfort of your home. Better yet, I simply wish retail stores here have their own websites even if they are just informational. Take for example furniture. I have been in need of upholstery services for quite some time now but have not been able to scour our neighborhood to find this service. So I turned to the internet. But I have searched until my eyes watered from staring too long at the monitor and I have not yet found anything.

There are tons of online sellers in multiply but most of them cater to clothes, shoes and accessories. Few sell makeup and those that do only sell a limited selection.

There is of course My Ayala but their prices are way higher than what you can get them for if you go to the store. I think they are more targeted towards Pinoys overseas.

I think this country has a long way to go to catch up with the US or even Singapore in e-commerce but I can’t help but wish we would hurry up. In the meantime, better start out early tomorrow so I can accomplish more.

Do you moms have the same experience?