Marie Claire magazine featured an article in its May 2007 edition about a certain mother’s club that exists in Japan. This club supposedly is composed of mothers within a community. Membership to the club is believed to be essential to one’s child’s success in school and in the community with regards to access to opportunity. Apparently, membership comes with opened doors to good schools and good services. Much like being in a high school clique.
It is a difficult task to get accepted into the club. One must be deemed acceptable by the members of the club and especially approved by the boss mom. One’s manners, clothes, income, friends, way of life is scrutinized and judged. Once a member, mothers have to behave, dress, walk, talk, and live according to the club’s defined standards which are mostly dependent on the club’s boss mom. Going against the group is social suicide.
Which is why many mothers are pressured into doing things they normally would not do just to be accepted to such an exclusive organization. Many would kill just to belong. Which is what happened one school day for two schoolchildren in Japan – Wakana Takemoto and Jin Sano, both aged five. Their classmate’s mother was supposed to drive them to kindergarten class but later on was killed by the same mother. And this is because the “mother’s club” failed to accept her for reasons we could only surmise.
It is sad how such things could lead to depression and eventually murder. It is sadder to think that truly the victims are the children who are very young to understand such pressures that their parents have to contend with.
This kind of clique is not exclusive to Japan. It exists in many communities around the world. It exists here in our country, maybe not as evident but then it does exist and we as responsible parents should ensure that we take care not to get our children entangled in such adult intricacies.
After all, they are the future – we should ensure they live to enjoy it.
[...] Re-posted from mother of two. [...]
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Hi! Came here through PMN. I heard about the “deadly mother’s club” somewhere. Learning about it made me think what could drive these mothers (or any person for that matter) to join such a club. Acceptance, feeling of belongingness, we can only guess. It’s sad though. I don’t know, the authorities should step in I guess if things get out of hand.
@Lynn
- Thanks for dropping by. Sometimes its easier to understand these people if we think that they must really believe that their children are being deprived of opportunities to a better life. I know I would do anything for my children. I am thankful there are no such pressures here.
The japanese culture of honor for ya. They have the win or die system that boosts thier suicidal rate rather than thier morality rate (they have one of the highest suicide counts)
oh, your blog is so nicely done! I like the colours…
@arelente2
- Yes. I have read a lot about Japanese culture that mortifies me and this is just one of those things. Thanks for visiting. And thanks for the compliment.
[...] am rarely surprised at the capability of some people to be cruel and abusive. This is the reality and we must deal with it. If you get too close to it then you must do what you [...]
[...] learned about how mothers behave in another part of the world that it made me appreciate what I have and where I live [...]