Working overseas

April 12, 2008 | Filed in: Personal

When I was young, I often dreamt of traveling abroad, going to Disneyland or Knott’s Berry Farm. I would always listen to fabulous stories from my classmates after coming back from summer vacation about how they have been here or there. At that time, my only experience riding an airplane was during a school fieldtrip. I had relatives that lived abroad and I often wondered how their lives were like compared to ours.

My work allows me opportunities for overseas employment. I have had several offers to work abroad (Asia and the US) and at one time, I even aggressively pursued those possibilities. When I was in Arizona a couple of years back on an assignment, I realized how I was not cut out to live amongst strangers and away from family. Oh yeah, I loved the fact that I earned enough to buy me a closet full of clothes, shoes and bags, and eat lobster any time I wished. But after the sun sets and I find myself alone in my apartment, I think how my shoes can never replace the witty banter my sisters are always having, or my mom’s tendency to remind me to do the something a hundred times a day, or my dad’s jokes that he keeps on repeating several times a day.

So am I just thinking of myself? Here I am with the chance to earn big and help my family out and I turn away. Even now, I can work abroad if I want to and earn lots of money. Technically, it would really help me and my husband establish our lives, build a home and give our kids all they can ever hope for. But I choose not to. And my husband supports me in that decision.

More money is good, but being with my family is best. I want to be there for every smile, tear, and wound that my kids have. I want to be the one to prepare my husband’s coffee every morning. I want to be the one to plan our vacation. I want to be there. Many think I should be more practical instead of ideal. I disagree. Do you?

12 Comments so far

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i agree with you completely. i couldn’t imagine life without my family now.. i mean my frenchguy and my daughter.

analyse - Im sure a lot of others feel the same way we do. It would probably be easier for me to live in a foreign place if my husband and family were with me there.

I am giving it a thought. But then at my age, I have been deeply rooted in the confines of my career and family. It would not be easy to pluck myself out from my “home” and start anew. Perhaps it is the “fear” that engulfs me, or what? I do not exactly know. Now that the US economy is down, I am having second thoughts again. I would always tell my wife, I would earn here in the Philippines that money.

Inkblots - I know how it is when you say “pluck yourself out of your home and start anew”. Sometimes, I think the fear you mention comes with age… not that I am hinting…hehe. But there comes a point in our lives that you just want to stay put and settle down… not because you have no dreams or ambitions but because your dreams are have changed.

Do these job opportunities not allow for family to emigrate with you? If not, then I would definitely stay with my family. That lost time can never be replaced!

But, if family can accompany you, I think you need to consider what benefits and lifelong opportunities your sons may gain as a result. Will they have more financial security, better educational opportunities, higher quality and standard of living, more worldliness? Aren’t we, as parents, supposed to sacrifice for the sake of our children? Isn’t our strength and self-confidence in the world part of the legacy we leave our children?

Today’s world is fast-changing. I don’t expect my daughter to live in the same world we do now. Whether or not we want to believe it, they will have different ideas from us, different priorities and certainly different VALUES! What is the best thing you can do to prepare your sons for a world that you can only try to imagine?

GloriaMC - I am afraid the opportunities I was faced with were those that did not allow for me to be accompanied by family without cost. And it is not that easy to come up with the money to uproot everyone and live in another country.

I agree that we (as parents) are supposed to sacrifice for the sake of our children. I would die for them. I will do anything for them but never at their expense. I have no doubt that better education, higher standard of living is what we should aim for, but if I am not there to ensure they get that… then what good will more money be?

i can’t see myself being away with my daughter for such a long distance and a long time. though at times when i think about how much money will i earn overseas but the thought of being away from my family makes me think a hundred times, yah money is such a big factor in life but there are still a lot of things that money can’t buy ie time being with my love ones.

marshi - I think its only tempting to go overseas because of the thought of a better life as a result of all the money we can potentially earn. However, I too believe that many times when family is involved, it would not always be about the money.

Nothing can replace the “moments” that you will share with your fam. I live in the US and do not have any plans of ever living in Pinas again…but all my family’s here na…so there’s really nothing over there to hold me back…

I think a lot of people dream of working overseas to earn more money, but you just have to weigh what’s more important and check if the sacrifice is worth it in the long run.

Noreen - Yes. And come to think of it, it doesn’t matter where you are really as long as you know how important your family is. People can be in the same place and feel miles apart.

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