Most mothers are built capable of nurturing and taking care of their families… not all, but most. It is such a stereotype but sometimes I think that genes also have something to do with it.

When a child is sick or sad, mothers are often the first to reach out, hug, comfort. I myself, do not think twice about staying home (instead of going to work) to care for a sick or troubled child.

So what happens when mothers get sick? Who stays at home to take care of them? Add to that, who takes care of those she cares for if she becomes too sick to even stand up?

So fellow moms, who takes care of you when youre sick? Who cooks you soup? Who prepares your juice? Who makes sure you drink your meds? Who checks your temperature?

Are you ready to get sick?

Is there something in the air? Several of my friends and a cousin are now on their way abroad to settle down with their foreign boyfriends. In fact, I just came from a going away party for my cousin who is off to Minneapolis tomorrow, with T, her American boyfriend.

It might sound or feel like such a cliche, but I personally don’t think it is.

It was not an arranged marriage, nor was it a marriage of convenience (for the sake of a green card). My cousin and her boyfriend are colleagues at the multinational company she works for. They met, fell in love and now they are getting married. The family met T and he is indeed adorable. I believe he will take care of my cousin and their family well.

I recall some 7 years ago when I was in L.A. visiting my relatives, I was introduced to about three or four foreigners by my cousins and by my friends. They were hoping that I hook up with someone and prayed that I would marry a foreigner and stay in the U.S. for good. I had a lot of fun going out and partying with them, but I did not have the heart to tell my relatives I wasn’t looking to marry myself a foreigner. Not that I had anything against them. I just never found or met anyone I really fancied.

My friends and I used to imagine what it would be like having to live with someone you couldn’t speak to in your native language. Although we all had good English communication skills, it would be quite a task to have to speak English 24 hours a day. What happens if you are mad and just want to scream - “Ano ka ba?” or some other familiar phrase in Filipino? It would probably take a few seconds of translating in your mind the words you want to say and by the time you are done, your anger has dissipated. Of course that would be a very tiny picture of the actual reality people face when they marry someone of a different race or origin.

So I guess that’s me. I personally don’t think I am up to that kind of challenge. A lot of my friends are and I admire them for it. The one thing that I do not like about marrying a foreigner is that I do not get to see my friends and I miss them so much.

To Bes - Wherever you are, married or not I know you are having the time of your life wherever you are (UK or HK)
To Bes(2) - I know you are very happy with J. I am glad I helped you meet him.
To Gette - Hang in there. I am so happy for the love that you share with T. I hope you are blessed with children of your own soon!

A year has come and gone. Many bloggers have created lists about their memorable times, accomplishments and disappointments in 2007. At the risk of sounding cliche, I will spin out my own list of sorts.

The year 2007 for me as a mother was a very hard and challenging year. The past 12 months have tested my strength and will as a mom. But look at me now, I am still standing, breathing… smiling. Though I must have aged considerably, more hair strands have gotten white, more lines have appeared on my face, my knees have gotten weaker, my back more sore than ever before… my spirit has grown more muscle. I will not call myself a survivor, (I think that should be reserved for those who truly deserve it) but I must say I have survived the most horrendous year in my 30-plus or so life (hehe).

The year that was… my personal challenges:

• 2007 is the poorest year I have had. Our family (me, my hubby and kids) have made a lot of sacrifices. We gave up traveling first and foremost. That was really hard for us as we loved traveling, even just to drive to nearby provinces. We gave up our weekly trips to the mall with the kids and instead became creative with the activities we did at home. My husband and I toned down our date night. If before we went to every new restaurant we have heard of (partly to have something to write about at our food blog), we also had to be creative about how we spent our date night. We settled for watching DVDs or our favorite late night shows while binging on junk food and reserved nights out for special occasions.
• 2007 is the continuation to my journey through married life. There were new lessons that I learned, new pains and challenges as a wife,  new revelations that contributed to my growth to becoming a better wife to my husband.
• 2007 is the hardest year I have had trying to balance work and family life. With a sweet but demanding husband (I love you sweetie), two equally demanding and growing kids, and a full time job, there were days when I could barely wake up to get up.

The list is short but the things that make up my list actually makes up my whole year as a mother.

The most important thing that helped me go through it all is the love of my dear family. My husband’s growing love and support for me, my oldest son’s faith and trust, and my youngest son’s love and smiles he throws my way. I have no doubt that 2008 will be much more difficult, much more challenging than the past year was but I also do not doubt that I will live through it just as I did today.

I thought that my mom was being herself when I observed how she used to finish leftovers from my and my siblings plate during mealtimes. “Mommy, I can’t finish my vegetables…” - to which she will respond - “It’s ok honey, leave it and I will finish it”. And wouldn’t you know, she will.

Several years later, me, a mom already to two very active boys who eat a lot, find myself doing the same thing my mom did. I now have this impulsion to finish off whatever is left in my kids’ plate (even my hubby’s sometimes hehe). Often, this impulse extends to the half-eaten whatevers that are in the refrigerator. Honestly, some cakes and snacks are too huge a serving for my kids to finish in one sitting. Mostly I am concerned of the food spoiling and being wasted. Other times I see it as leftovers of my hours in preparing and cooking the food that my family eats.

A conversation with another mom-friend during a barkada reunion resulted in a confession of the same habit at her house. We laughed and complained that it is one of the major reasons why moms gain weight. We could only sigh out loud. At the end of the day, that is a part of what moms do for their children and their family.

One great fact about moms that is emphasized by this simple action although such an unhealthy one, is that moms are just always there for anything that their families need them for. They are there to nurture, feed, dress, teach, serve, comfort, cheer (etc) their families. They are there for anything and everything, even something as simple as a leftover receptacle.

Happy New Year!

I was brought up believing that Christmas is a season of giving (remember Hallmark?) and of being with family, friends and loved ones. It is a season of forgiving and more loving… of coming home. Are we not witnesses to more people doing good during the Christmas season?

I remember an incident years ago when I was still young and stubborn. I had a fight with my dad that resulted in me giving him the silent treatment. Two months went by without me ever talking to him until Christmas came. I finally woke up and apologized (I think hehe) to him and it was back to normal since then.

The Christmas season does that to people, I guess.

I haven’t felt Christmas for three years now. Its not the decreasing number of gifts that I receive (less gifts as you get older). Its not the decreasing number of parties that I attend or the food that I eat. It is because two people I love still don’t get along and I am in the middle of everything.

Christmas will never be complete as long as my family is not whole. And with the way things are going, this is how it will remain to be.

This is just one of those times that everything I ever believed in is suddenly not the truth anymore. And it sucks that the meaning of Christmas is not strong enough to fix whatever it is that has been broken.

Tsk tsk.

I think majority of those who enjoy the holiday season are kids. The reasons are many - there’s vacation from school, lot of parties, lots of delicious food and yummy desserts, not to mention the tons of gifts they anticipate to get.

I remember that the time that I graduated from college and started with my first job was the year that I stopped getting gifts for Christmas. My mom buys gifts only for the kids and just brings food for the adults.

When you go to the malls, the one place that is almost always packed would be the toy store - Toy Kingdom, Toys R Us - the next would be the gift-wrapping section.

I found myself in one of those toy stores looking for a gift for my 4 year old. He has always been hankering for a toy train, specifically Thomas. Do you know how much those cost? It amazes me how expensive kid’s toys are these days. One Thomas tank engine costs about P350 to P900. That would only give you one vehicle. Getting the tracks, buildings and other accessories for a train set will set you off about P5K to P6K. You would think this is a toy for an adult rather than a child who is able to tear down your P5K gift into a million pieces before you can even say Merry Christmas.